Why I Am Expecting Great Things in 2014

Why I Am Expecting Great Things in 2014

No such thing as a happy new year for gloomy Left

No such thing as a happy new year for gloomy Left

What’s God’s Purpose for You in 2014?

What’s God’s Purpose for You in 2014?

My New Year Message

Views, Visions and Values.: Forgetting the Past, and moving forward towards th...: A number of years ago,  while back in my home town of Neath, my pastor at the time, Pastor Ernest Williams quoted this Scripture,  wh...

Make 2014 the year you find love Written by HopefulGirl

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For Christmas one year, I got more than I’d bargained for. I was unceremoniously dumped by my fiancé. We’d been together for some years, so it came as a tremendous shock when, just as we were finally planning the whole wedding-and-babies thing, he announced out of the blue that it was all off. It turned out my replacement was already waiting in the wings, although he was too cowardly to tell me himself.

During my year of recovery, I worked my way through a stack of weird and wonderful self-help books. Despite the embarrassment of being caught reading Why Men Marry Some Women And Not Others on the train (why didn’t I just hide it inside a copy of The Shack?), these books taught me a thing or two. Mainly that if we’re serious about meeting Mr (or Ms) Right, we must be pro-active about it. Instead of waiting for God to drop a partner into our laps, we should put ourselves in situations where we meet lots of suitable people, and not linger in relationships that aren’t heading towards marriage (I learned that lesson the hard way).

By the time the following Christmas rolled around, I felt ready for romance again. At 36 and still hoping to have a family, there was no time to waste if I was to meet Mr Right while there were still a few eggs left in the basket. So my new year’s resolution was to find the love of my life. I launched my ‘new year, new love’ campaign by throwing myself enthusiastically into the world of Christian dating.

It turned out my timing couldn’t have been better. Dating websites get their biggest number of new subscribers at the start of the year, so there were plenty of eager cyberdaters to meet and chat to. In fact, last year on Christian Connection, the number of new members doubled between December and January! There were 60% more log-ins, twice as many photos uploaded, and more than double the number of messages sent.

So if you’re looking for love and are considering joining – or rejoining – the Christian dating scene, now is the ideal time to do it. Who knows, your perfect partner may be sitting behind a computer screen right now, hoping their future beloved is about to pop up on a Christian dating website. However, it’s not enough to upload your profile, sit back and wait for the offers to drop into your inbox. As with most things in life, you get out what you put in, and being pro-active is the name of the game.

What if you’re already on the Christian singles scene, but things aren’t happening for you, or you’re becoming demoralised? (Yes, I’ve been there too.) Now is the time to change it up, or step it up – or both. First, refresh your approach. If you’re losing enthusiasm for online dating, why not try speed dating? If you’re seeing the same old faces at singles parties, consider organising a group meet-up in your area. You can find or arrange all these on Christian Connection and its sister sitewww.eventsforchristians.co.uk, and it’s a great way to encounter new people and gain a fresh wave of enthusiasm.

Second, step it up a gear. Set yourself targets to contact at least one new person a week, and arrange one date a month (more would be better). Does that sound rather business-like and unromantic? Maybe so, but the truth is you’re unlikely to hit the jackpot on your first, or even tenth, date. Occasional miraculous encounters aside, for most of us, finding love is a numbers game – or as my brother TopBro told me: ‘HopefulGirl, you might have to kiss a lot of frogs to find your prince.’ Well, I didn’t plan on kissing too many, but I was willing to meet lots of men and go on plenty of dates, if that’s what it took to find my Prince Charming.

So did my ‘new year, new love’ campaign work for me? Well, that would rather give away the ending of my book… let’s just say the mistletoe wasn’t wasted this Christmas!

It’s a new year, friends. Time for a fresh start. Your perfect partner is out there somewhere – your mission for 2014 is to find them.

When looking for love, do you have a strategy, or do you just wing it and see what happens? Are you considering a different approach in 2014?

Read more articles on: Dating & Relationships, Singleness

About HopefulGirl

Would Like To Meet by HopefulGirl is packed with funny and moving stories from the Christian dating scene. To buy the book (in paperback or Kindle) or download a free sampler, visitwww.brfonline.org.uk/hopefulgirl. You can connect with HopefulGirl at www.facebook.com/HopefulGirlUKor www.twitter.com/HopefulGirlUK. HopefulGirl is the singles/dating columnist for Woman Alive magazine(www.womanalive.co.uk).

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Prince Charles: ‘Pray for Middle Eastern Christians’

Prince Charles: ‘Pray for Middle Eastern Christians’

THE TYRANNY OF ADVICE COLUMN CHRISTIANITY, Resurgance

Matt Johnson » God Scripture Heart Gospel Justification Culture

HOW TO NOT FIX YOUR PROBLEMS WITH NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS

I saw a commercial once (at 2 a.m.) that said I have to do whatever it takes to “actualize my best me.” Jargon aside, it makes sense, really. Doing results in being. Cause and effect. Want six-pack abs? Just buy the right product and give your new, healthy lifestyle 110% for 10 weeks and maybe you’ll see results. (Phew, I guess it’s time to get to work on those resolutions …)  It makes sense to assume that doing something will produce some change. But a personal makeover obsession won’t do one bit of good when it comes to fixing the human condition.  

When you feel defeated by sin, burnt out by expectations, and discouraged by your inability to get it together, the last thing you need is “good advice.” So I don’t have any new advice for you. But I do have a bit of helpful hyperbole: Advice is tyranny. Okay, that’s a little over the top. But there’s a reason for the overstatement. 

SPIRITUAL SUCCESS IN 4 EASY STEPS 

Advice is fine as far as it goes. Occasionally people get it together and take the 2 a.m., six-pack abs advice. But spiritually speaking, advice won’t do you one iota of good. In fact, it may make things worse. 

Christians often make the mistake of translating obedience to God’s Law as the means by which we gain God’s acceptance.

There is a spiritual principle here. If we zoom out to 40,000 feet and consider God’s will for people (his Law), we see that ultimately, his Law mirrors back to us our failures and  try as we might, we simply can’t live up to it. God’s Law isn’t the problem—it’s good and holy. The problem is our indwelling sin and our inability to keep that holy Law.

Unfortunately, Christians often make the mistake of translating obedience to God’s Law as the means by which we gain God’s acceptance. This creates a whole host of problems that often ends in guilt-ridden, spiritual burnout. Over time, some clue into this bait-and-switch and bail from the church altogether knowing they’ll never add up. Some are more resilient and continue to beat their heads against the wall. Whatever the case, if acceptance before God hinges on spiritual achievement, we’re going to need some serious help. This is where Christian-y steps-to-spiritual-success advice comes in.  

The list might go a little something like this: 

• Make sure to have a daily quiet time.
• Join a Christian club and get to work.
• Pray more.
• Do more volunteerism.

The problem with this list is that it presupposes that with the right amount of effort, we can please God. But how much effort is enough? How does God weigh a person’s good and bad actions. What if all that effort wasn’t enough?

And this is how it goes. Advice meant to “help” will play a switcheroo on you and cause the kind of anxiety that keeps someone up at night watching bad Ab Buster infomercials. See what I mean? Tyranny. But I’ve got some good news that will help you get a better night’s sleep.

If you are a Christian, God is pleased with you because of what Jesus has already done. To be a Christian is to be united to Jesus in faith, which means God sees Jesus’ moral record, not your checkered one. When we really get that, then our bullet point list becomes a grateful, worshipful response from the heart, rather than a list of Christian duties. You don’t have to have devotional time. You get to. You don’t have to do acts of Christian service. You get to. See the difference? 

SOMETHING FOR NOTHING

Our dutiful checklists are intuitive. Punishments and rewards based on good (or bad) behavior is plain sense. What we don’t get—what we have to hear over and over—is the something-for-nothing of the gospel.

Jesus has made peace between us and God once and for all. And we benefit from that, for free. We need to be told again and again and again that our sin is forgiven, and that there is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus. And sometimes, we just need to get the attention off of ourselves, and meditate on unmerited grace! 

For those with tortured consciences, know that, as you come to Jesus, you get welcome, not condemnation. For the overachievers in the crowd, you can forget the extreme spiritual makeover, and know that all the doing meant to gain you acceptance has already been done.

The answer is in Jesus, not you.

You’re in good company: I’m often self-involved and need to hear this as much as the next guy. So when I realize I’m off kilter (which is often!) I read Ephesians 1 again to get refocused. So take a moment and read this. Read it slowly, and let it sink in. 

Get that? If you are in Christ, you are:

• Blessed with every spiritual blessing
• Chosen before the foundation of the world
• Holy and blameless before Christ
• Adopted as sons and daughters
• Redeemed through his blood
• Forgiven of your trespasses

Your spiritual striving didn’t accomplish your in Christian-ness. And after you came to Christ, and screwed everything up, he didn’t let go. Before you were born, before you thought a thought, and before you felt the gnawing guilt of not living a fully transformed Christian life, you were chosen, loved, adopted, redeemed, and forgiven. Period.  

CHUCKING ADVICE COLUMN CHRISTIANITY IN EXCHANGE FOR GOOD NEWS

That first part of Saint Paul’s letter is an elated, breathless, gotta-wipe-the-sweat-off-his-brow-with a-hanky-Pentecostal riff filled to the brim with the stuff that we really need.

Do you see it? The answer is in Jesus, not you. He’s the man who lived the life you have not lived and died the death you should have died so that you don’t have to live for you. Hallelujah, the pressure is off!

Thanks be to God, Jesus inverts the logic of both the spiritual overachiever’s aspirations as well as the dejected defeatist’s commiserations. In Christ both are already lavished with forgiveness, blessing, election, and blamelessness. God doesn’t bank on you to make good on all that advice; Jesus already accomplished perfection. Now your life gets to be a joyful response of gratitude!

So, Christian, you have permission to forget about what Advice Column Christianity is trying to sell you. Your gut has been right all along: the stick and carrot of spiritual advice is tyranny. We’ve got really-and-truly good news. You don’t have to experience life transformation to be loved. You’re already loved in Christ.